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[03 Aug 2009|06:48am] |
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Good morning internet,
It's time for another rambling update, er, valuable insight into my life. Well. Not much to say really except this weekend has been a complete fucking washout. Seriously. Write it off. Infact the whole of last week can fuck off too really, it's been pretty shit overall.
It's only little things that have really pissed me off, I'm still shuffling down the path of mediocrity and having a fairly good time. One of the main things that pissed me off last week was the washout of brighton pride. I literally mean, washout. It was HAMMERERING it down the whole time and I got soaked to the underwear which wasn't particularly fun.
I got separated from a lot of my friends at points which was irritating as i was trying to organise a million things at once. I then walked the wrong way 'back to town' and ended up in Hove - The opposite way to Central Brighton.
After meeting up with an old friend for a few pints I got the train home on which I promptly fell asleep and was rudely awoken by some pissed-up pikey fucker who delighted to inform me that he'd been ripping it out of a 'paki' all night and he couldn't even understand him. I bet his mother is proud. (she probably fuckin' is. Kids learn by example after all.)
I got off the train before I decided to insert his head up his ass and chill out at Havant, where I was going to get the next train. An hour and a half wait. Bollocks to that, I went and crashed with parents.
Yesterday had the saving graces of the weekend. I got back home about midday and proceeded to do nothing. A friend kelly called me up to ask if I wanted to still go climb trees in the common, so i got my stuff together and headed over where I met her and another friend nick.
The climbing kinda.. well.. failed. but on the upside, we made a fucking huge campfire that was spewing heat, and got pretty drunk :D I came back home and got in finally about 2am where I slept until now. I write this under a haze of tea, toast and tiredness and really don't want to be at work today. Hmm. Back to the grind.
Next weekend the lovely girlfriend, miss ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1) helene_atsuko is coming down to stay for a bit :3 this makes me very happy indeed and gives me something to look forward to at least :D
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| Metamorphosis |
[27 Jul 2009|12:10am] |
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So the weekend has come and go in a flash - I think you're supposed to feel rested and relaxed so you can go back to work feeling refreshed. That's probably not going to happen.
After my epic 8 hour sleep on Friday evening, I pottered around town, purchased a new jacket and re-bleached and cut my hair. Went out and got smashed with some good friends in the evening, and today has mainly been doing nothing.
Yep, pretty drunk at this point.
So, been in my room nearly all evening listening to 'Enigma', chain smoking and considering sleep. The last part there is the only bit that hasn't happened so far. I've been feeling pretty reflective on everything tonight - I get like this occasionally. Y'know, where you sit and process everything you currently feel, you daydream to yourself of situations you may find yourself in, in the near future and consider options you've had before.
I'm pretty happy with the way things are going right now. I quite like my job even if it is a mission to get to and doesn't pay hugely well, but i'm usually the #1 or #2 salesperson there. I love my housemates to bit, the house is a bit small and messy, but hey. Southampton remains constant, it's one of the most chilled places i've been. I have all the things I really need, and generally I break even at the end of the month. As most of you know one of the more recent massive positives to my life has been meeting and then dating the wonderful miss helene_atsuko who fills me with confidence in myself, optimism and happiness. I couldn't really ask for anymore right now without being greedy.
Quite looking forward to tomorrow, If i keep doing as well at work as I have been doing, I might win a wii at the end of the month. That'd be fucking awesome. Going to Brighton Pride next weekend, should be a laugh! I haven't been for years now, and it was really good fun from what I remember.
Something scared me a bit earlier. I was chatting with someone about clubs in London and slimelight got mentioned - I realised I've been going out (specifically there) for 8 and a half years now. Christ.
Doesn't time fly?
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| The unthinkable happened. |
[24 Jul 2009|10:35am] |
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I woke up late. I went to generic emo/metal club last night in the end up, got kicked out of hotel (Trespassing for nice views @ 2am) and got shirty with a guy who was harrassing my friend Lou on the way home.
Anyway, I awake after 3 hours sleep, found a deoderant can on the floor, used it, put on yesterday's clothes including my underware and ran for the train. I made it with 1 minute to spare, all sweaty and annoyed.
I didn't even say good morning to the Big Issue guy I always talk to. How rude.
So now I'm at work, using the KITCHINTERNET on the 4 pc's they have between 4 people.
When you call NHS direct to complain that you have swine flu, you're potentially dying and you need tamiflu more than you need a cup of tea and Jeremy Kyle at 9:25 in the morning, rest easy knowing that it's our company that has hired a lot (circa 200 in 2 days it seems) of new staff reading off a script to deal with your call.
Anyway, I'm going off on a tangent. I was preparing my self to be in a foul mood for the rest of the day - Anyone that knows me understands I hate mad rushes (Even if I do bring them on myself) and without my daily chill-out before work I act like a real commuter and not my normal cheerful self.
My sleep quota since last thursday is now somewhere around 25 hours. Not sure what it's about, last time this happened it was stress that was keeping me up - I certianly don't feel stressed. My caffine in take is nowhere near it used to be either. I'm getting the twitch in the top of my cheek again too which is irritating the living shit out of me.
On another tangent I just found this note to a friend of mine Andy I wrote one morning towards the start of the year:-
I'm feeling a lot like that now. To explain, I was working in Soton as a call monkey, selling all manner of shit to consumers - namely double glazing and products like that. It was awful. Yep, I was one of those people that would phone you up whilst you're eating your dinner / watching eastenders / wanking / all of the above and generally be ridiculously perky and annoying at you. Anyway, Andy and I had a heavy night out and I'd had approx 1 hour sleep before I had to go sit at a desk and drool into a headset. To explain, I woke up with bike light in my pocket and random cuts and bruises.
Uh that's pretty much it. I'm rambling again. I really do worry that my delusional mind will trick me into thinking I'm sane one day when I would have actually lost the plot long ago.
Anywho. On with today.
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[23 Jul 2009|06:48am] |
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Good Morning Internet.
I am slightly tired today, i think the lack of sleep is beginning to kick in. It's been averaging around 3 to 4 hours a night since last Thursday and although I can do a full day's work on even less than this - a) I don't like to unless I have to and b) they're usually pulled once in a blue moon.
Someone asked me why I get up so early every day - It's more of a warm up for the day. Some people go to the gym, or do something useful but I am normally sitting on my bed naked, drinking a cup of tea, smoking a roll-up and being generally reflective on recent events. As Zen as it sounds it's more like being in a trance than attempting to reach enlightenment.
I usually spend the from 6am to 8:30am by myself without saying a word to anyone. I've always been 'good with mornings' but it's somewhat autopilot - I can never remember specifics about anything I have done in the early hours of the day.
Not too sure where I'm going with this one, I'll probably think of something relevant to say before the end of the day. I should probably put some clothes on as my train will be nearing Southampton about now.
So as the sun rises, the sirens begin and the pigeon that is trying to rape a smaller pigeon on my garage roof might get his filthy way, I'm off to work again.
Here. Have some youths.
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| The world will end with a whimper and not a bang, but how will it start? |
[22 Jul 2009|06:54am] |
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Good morning internet.
I decided it was time to pick up my LJ again and spew forth ramblings to let you all know i'm still shuffling along on my mortal coil. Broadcasting loud and clear post-shower-pre-work from the good city of Southampton where we are constantly on our guard - spending our time being vigilant and aware from the ever-present threat of being invaded by the isle of wight.
So, what's new? Well pictures speak a thousand words so I'll do it that way.
Well, I have been working for the past 4 1/2 months for a company in portsmouth called TLC. No, it's not getting a capital letter, it doesn't deserve one.
TLC is a multi-client communication channel that provides outsourced solutions to many blue chip clients. In other words, it's a call center. I work for T-mobile exclusively, along with a team of 10 people on the corporate team. It actually is a bit better than it sounds.
I live near the center of town with a teacher, a hockey fan and a goth who we keep locked in a cupboard downstairs. Our house is small and lodge-like. Imagine a residence you'd live in when staying in a holiday camp in norfolk paid for by collecting tokens from the sun for six weeks. That's what our house is like.
Recently I've started dating a pixie/angel crossover that found me wandering the streets of Brighton and felts sorry for me so took me in. She's utterly awesome and we are going to save the world by doing various adventures and drinking as much as we can on the way.
Inbetween attempting to become the poster child for an alcohol awareness ad campaign and chain smoking everything I can roll into a rizla, I can usually be found in various rock clubs along the south.
I hope I've painted a good picture of my daily life currently. I've got to go to work now, an hour on the train where I have dodge students passed out all over the high street on the way, moaning and holding their stomachs after a night of drinking out of date booze. It's a lot like a scene from the start of saving private ryan or the killing fields.
I'll probably update more soon, with less rambling and more factual information. Maybe more pictures too, so I don't have to write as much. You just wait. A year down the line I'll have posts comprised entirely of pictures. You can never have enough.
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[20 Jan 2009|04:01pm] |
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| Liberation, Revolution & Freedom (Also work.) |
[12 Jan 2009|06:42am] |
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I wasn't too sure what to call this post, as it was meant to be just a few lines but something has come up and it's bothering me now.
I'm upset at how.. Diluted? Our language has become. Now don't get me wrong - I'm no literary genius, far from it, but surely it's obvious these days how words are stolen from us.
Words like 'Freedom' and 'Revolution' and 'Liberation' - very powerful indeed. Freedom means governmental control. Revolution is a vodka bar. Liberation is a new flight sim game. A quick search of these words throws up a million corporate websites. Language constantly changes, and new words are invented and some are phased out.
Some terms aren't used any more as they are no longer needed. When was the last time you saw a 'cooper' advertised in a local paper :)? (A cooper is someone who used to make barrels, a trade that died out pre-WW1.)
I'm not sure where I am going with this, it's just some 6am thoughts for you.
Anywho. Today I am going to be working my ass off like there's no tomorrow. I'm going to be in London a few days from Wedneday, as I have some 'things' to sort out ;)(That really wasn't meant to be as dodgy as that sounds..)
I have given fallout 3 to a friend so I can work harder today. I don't want the distraction. I know i'll end up playing it. I also have enough tea lined up to kill a small army. Today is going to be a good today. It's going to be a productive day, and I'm going to get where the fuck I want to be shortly.
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[09 Jan 2009|06:29pm] |
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[01 Jan 2009|04:10pm] |
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Off to a good start to the year.
My house didn't get burgled. Hooray! Good party with awesome friends.
Heading up to London on saturday for a bit, and hopefully back to the grind the week after.
We shall see. I'm optimistic and hopeful about a few things right now.
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| lol |
[01 Jan 2009|11:06am] |
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lol 2009
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| Fuck you, 2008. |
[29 Dec 2008|09:25am] |
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Typical, I know. It's about this time of year when the bleary-eyed look back on what has happened this year, what they have achieved, and what could be better about the year. I'd do similar but all in all I could really sum it up in two words: fucking horrendous.
"Now now Marc, that's a bit strong. It's not been that bad?"
Fuck you. From January 1st 2008 this year has been nothing but cruel to me. (If you don't remember, I returned from a NYE party to find my flat had been burgled, literally taken to the fucking cleaners.)
To be fair, it's not specifically the year it's self that has wronged me. It's just a number. It's the actions ultimately that I've taken myself that have led me to have such a shit time. The same actions led me to some of the happiest memories i'll have for ages too. I wish I could just say (and actually do) "from Jan 1st 2009 everything will be better, or i'll try to be" but I know it wouldn't be true.
I've really fucked up in the past 12 months, numerous times. I swear, If i could do anything to change some of the epic mistakes i've made this year, i'd do it in a snap. This was without a doubt the first year I took regrets on board, and i'd rather not have any more.
I've had some high points too. Don't get me wrong. I've met a lot of new people, I've had friends that have really been there for me through high and low, Got some serious revenge, Drunk and smoked my fill.
What next?
The answer is I don't know. I'm still spinning. I still change my mind every two mins. I know what i'd like in an ideal world, but what i'd like will never happen it seems.
So yeah. I'll stop just going off on one now. Ultimately, fuck you 2008. C'mon 2009. Throw me a bone here. We could do so much.
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[22 Dec 2008|01:35am] |
aw fuck it..
I was goin to write that post that is burning inside me to come out, but I can't seem to get the words, so I had a few whiskies to lubricate the brain but then had a few more and got drunk so i'm not going to even try now.
It'll come.
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| exhausted |
[20 Dec 2008|10:23pm] |
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The ASDA warehouse is like this ^
There's an epic post brewing somewhere. I just don't have the energy to write it right now.
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[10 Dec 2008|01:17pm] |
I got bored and imagechan amused me. Have some.
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